From the ‘Disgruntled Employee Handbook’ Files: THE SUGGESTION BOX (Part 1)

Dear ABC Agency Management:

First, I’d like to thank you for establishing this Suggestion Box and for inviting us employees to share our thoughts and ideas for improving the agency. It’s great to know that you’re interested in hearing from the rank and file.

Thank you also for placing the box in the third-floor maintenance closet behind the cleaning supplies. Making it difficult for us to get to is a great way to ensure that only those with serious suggestions will make the effort.

Oh, one more thing. I tend to ramble if I’m not kept on a tight leash. So thank you for insisting that our submissions be fewer than 300 words or they won’t be read.

Anyway, here goes:

– Please stop calling them “challenges” and “issues.” They’re actually problems.

– Can we end the birthday card thing? We have enough pressure without watching that unmarked folder make its way around the office, knowing we’re going to have to write something witty, sincere and brief — and then send it on for the rest of the department to scrutinize. Please issue this new rule as soon as possible.

Well, I think I’m nearing the 300-word limit. So on the hope that you might implement one of these suggestions, I’m going to stop writing. If I have any more ideas, I’ll include them in a separate note and drop it off next time I’m up here on the third floor, in the maintenance closet, behind the cleaning supplies.

Thanks!

About the Author

Robbie Hyman is a professional communications and public affairs writer. He has 15 years’ experience writing for nonprofits, small business and multibillion-dollar international organizations and is available as a freelance writer for federal agencies.

Robbie has written thousands of pages of content, including white papers, speeches, published articles, reports, manuals, newsletters, video scripts, advertisements, technical document and other materials. He is also co-founder of MoneySavvyTeen.com, an online course that teaches smart money habits to teenagers.